PIRATE-INSPIRED PADI

Moved

2008-06-10T01:08:00.001+08:00

I have, moved.

http://www.pocketcellar.blogspot.com/

'The Square Root of 3'

2008-05-28T11:13:00.000+08:00

Oh damn.
I haven't done anything productive, at least not from my point of view, for the last 2 hours.. unless you count plucking strands of hay-like hair, working. :)

Harold and Kumar was hilarious – especially the Cockmeat Sandwich and The Square Root of 3 Poem bit.

'The Square Root of 3'

I fear that I will always be,
A lonely number like root three
A three is all that's good and right,
Why must my three keep out of sight
Beneath a vicious square root sign,
I wish instead I were a nine
For nine could thwart this evil trick,
with just some quick arithmetic
I know I'll never see the sun, as 1.7321,
Such is my reality, a sad irrationality
When hark! What is this I see,
Another square root of a three
Has quietly come waltzing by,
Together now we multiply
To form a number we prefer,
Rejoicing as an integer
We break free from our mortal bonds,
And with a wave of magic wands
Our square root signs become unglued,
And love for me has been renewed.

I have been dreaming about the trip to HK; the shiny window fronts of every shopping mall calling, my powerless resistance to buy shoes for maybe, the next decade or so, the beautiful sceneries any camera would approve, the glorious food/ orgasmic delicacies … I am already imagining the amount of stuff I will lug back and what my mum, sis and JKN will say when they notice (and they will notice). I will surely cover my tracks by forking out for some presents for them. :p

Tennis will be at its last lesson today. I marvel at how I truly enjoyed the 8 weeks (make that 7 because of a breakup and a no-nonsense 1-time-class-drop-out), practicing to maintain a hard shell of “Tennis-skill”, practicing with a dozen of “Sorry!” apologies, a failed attempt to create an impression that I might be best in class after a “Melissa and the Frying Pan Grip” label (to date I still enjoy calling myself that), winning a Mini Championship, receiving a 2nd nick : Windscreen Wiper, winning 1st runner up! for no apparent talent but I did GOOD!, admiring Sharon’s cute Tennis shoes and rolling eyes at the Coach’s fave lines between, “Josiah, you be captain”, “Josiah, you first.”

... Haha I love it.

A run-through of the things I’ve learnt:
1) Handshake Grip
2) Eastern Forehand
3) Backhand
4) Serving!
5) Volleys
6) Doubles
7) Overhead Smashes
8) Stupid drills

It is proven: Tennis is not the preserve of the ultra-talented or the ultra-rich. (If it were, I would not be here.) But ultra-blessed I am, thank you Jesus. For I know I play a good game because You make me good.

Involved on a Tuesday Night

2008-05-27T20:32:00.001+08:00

I know it's not an opportune time to be using the computer, what with a movie to catch in less than an hour, but it feels so good to be back home.

Harold and Kumar :) in my fave soft trackpants.

I wonder why too

2008-05-27T02:31:00.000+08:00

Cheers for the update, and for gawd knows why I post the photos I post (last entry).
Well. Hope they made up for my almost non-existant writing blog.

I have been away; enjoying strange weather, strange sleeping habits, strange activities. and the company of a strange gentleman - somewhat.

Life is very much faster now that it borders on a "I wonder what's next?" mode - sleeping and waking odd hours, not realising breakfast from lunch, lunch from dinner + supper, step panic into overdrive by drinking too much wine, catching too many movies and refusing to get out of bed.
It is pretty awesome.

But then it also takes some oomph out of the romance.. if romance I can call it be.
I can be polite and distant, or fun and a joy like a darling.. but what I am attempting?

Actually, sometimes I feel like a pile of bones.
So i ignore myself.

I'm brimming with ideas for a good photography expedition - I'm going Hong Kong!! for a short business trip. The single conclusion to (not shopping! but..): More great photos!
I have but one interest in photography, and it may surprise you to know, I hope I can come up with a book. A photobook.
AMEN!

I beam at the thought of re-feathering a nest, my room a nest, that is. I've been meaning to do since the beginning of forever but. up until now, it pretty much still looks the same.
Actually it is the same.
JKN previously put together my ceiling lamp (when he still came over - that is HOW LONG it has been.) It still sits (in high style) at my dining area, irrelevant to the other pieces-ware.
Lol.

I wonder when I'll finally get started.

Repair In Progress (RIP)

2008-05-18T22:58:00.001+08:00

38 EK Place

Home

2008-05-07T11:07:00.000+08:00

I hope it's just the mensus - cos I feel terrible.
I feel like I cant do anything anymore, and I dont even want to want to do it.

I'm so cold I hid in the toilet, clammy hands over face,.. so fazed out, I feel like sticking a handiplast on my forehead,.. so stormy a stomach, I could cook curry inside.

I want to go home.

Easy?

2008-05-07T01:30:00.000+08:00

Hehe, I've had one friend ask me "easy"?
"how easy this breakup had been – I’ve always thought I knew the easiest and shakiest breakups came from broken relationships without God, people who weren’t Christians and were insecure everywhere.."

I didnt mean the breakup was Easy for me.
I meant Easy = Fragile to touch, to break. Easily broken.

My English .. Fantastico.
Sometimes I dont even understand myself.

You are the hero of my life

2008-05-07T00:02:00.000+08:00

When was the last time you heard NCC's "You Gave" album?
It's been a long while for me.. and now, just superly in season. God knows me so well, loves me so much. :D I'm in love with You - In Love.

I'm going on a Photography Expedition again! If I can do it everyday, I probably will.
I stopped because No Camera!.. but I am inspired again! In case someone says I copy him, I probably started learning on my own first! Great angling Mel! .. Lol, cant bother.. he probably doesnt even know what I'm talking about; he practically has no reception everywhere.

I met up with Shas today, over crispy donuts, ice milktea - fuelled by sweet food and chatting: No proper dinner required.
I had a wondrous time, and I became so sweet I even walked you to your bus stop! Dam. I must find you a boyfriend.

ZC doing an aussie report now. We devised how many plans to meet since he left for aussie? Plenty and each time we dont, only I whine on msn. He? He only does this awfully long report and tells me he will always be on my side (after i forced him to) and really wants to talk to me. I'm sleeping soon already and I'm in SG time hello. Eh! shouldnt you be sleeping already.?? Heeps

Pea and I are thrown into a confusion of how to hand in our R-love letter.
Know what I mean?

A few things I want to do:
1) Learn the guitar (Shawnie said if I'm serious he'll buy me one and teach me. Hallelujah. I'm also serious over an iPod.)
2) Tennis. OF COS!
3) Photography Expedition. Anytime
4) Picking Saga Seeds - Shas said outside Alexandra Hospital.. I think Ang Mo Kio too.. find a bright morning. Maybe MC on Friday . Ey, I know myself too well.
5) Work overseas - A whole fraction of my life in Singers. Dont you want the best for me? Well. maybe 20% travel? That'd be cool.

No Big Deal

2008-05-06T18:06:00.003+08:00

I was telling pea yesterday that I guess a part of why I’m alittle bonky .. is the irony(somewhat).. of how easy this breakup had been – I’ve always thought I knew the easiest and shakiest breakups came from broken relationships without God, people who weren’t Christians and were insecure everywhere..

Well. I’m not entirely right am I.. Gawd I just went through one.

No big deal. It shows I am human … I am vulnerable, I fall out of love, I get messed up,…… I am nothing without Jesus. What about you? :P

MX - one of my most “favouritest” friends since poly called me today.

MX: Hey, I’ll drop your wedding invitation in your mailbox. What’s your unit number? (I went for her ROM last year with Lionel)

Mel: XXXXX. Whee, I’m excited!

MX: Ok, bring lionel along ok.

Mel: Oh, we broke up already. You're getting married and I'm still breaking up. God bless! (She doesn’t know I’m going through a second one and somehow. I can’t find it in myself to explain. I find this amusing)

MX and Mel: LOL.

MX: Just anyhow bring someone along LAAAAAA. I got 2 seats for you.

For the first time in so many days, I actually. Really laughed. At myself . At my own its-no-big-deal.

Just

2008-05-06T00:15:00.004+08:00

I dont care if u just got back from Hong Kong, just finished your last exam paper, just passed your driving test.. i'm not interested, i'm not hearing.
My ears are plugged (shall not remove) - just selfish. just me me me. just Jesus filling me.
(a walking ipod/ sleeping laptop)

For Mel

2008-05-05T11:56:00.001+08:00

If you know how warm it has been of late, you would think I’m half crazy doing the things I do. Everyday now no matter how warm I feel, I have this urging need to wrap myself up, don on a sweater/ jacket and socks and snuggle underneath any big duvet. You could say I need a tight snuggle for the struggle.

I can never thank God enough for the patience He has blessed me with over this period of time. I grew.. and I believe I grew a lot. While Patience is a fruit of the Spirit, never has it been called a fruit of torture. Torture sounds really severe, well. Lack of a better description, I guess it means I gave in, and compromised on what Jesus has called me to be.. His beloved Princess. While many fall into the extreme end of claiming their “rights” – the overly excessive need to be treated like a princess by their boyfriends, how many also fall into the other end, of compromising the “right” to be preciously cherished? It’s not good to be on either ends. I realized I can’t compare the relationship now with any other relationships I’ve had not only because it has been with a different person, but also because the situations have been vastly different. So you get my drift.

I know God only wants the best for me. And uncertainty doesn’t cut it. If God already has the answers before I am faced with the challenges, then surely He will bring me through every circumstance with Glory…

He is my city of refuge and His love for me is the only thing I need. And I relish in that. I relish in the Rest where I don’t have to speak to anyone, I’m not answerable to anyone, and I don’t have to find things/ activities to do to distract me from feeling the way that I do.

And yes, I mean it too when I say I taste the inside death. I guess I allow myself to go; to feel. I allow the nausea in my mouth, the pain in my doubt, the confusion in my surety, the “I thought I know what I should do”……

I love tennis. I enjoy it so much, it hurts - physically and now, literally. to give the lessons up. I get advices all over to keep at it….. that sounds really easy. I get advices too .. to quit it.

What is worth more than tennis? Well, surely my heart. There you have it. If he should move on, why shouldn’t you?

Harmless as Doves but Wise as Serpents.
Mel – Highly regarded by God, Child of the Most High God.

The taste of inside death

2008-05-04T19:29:00.000+08:00

Painful. Pure Painful.

i can imagine

2008-04-23T13:33:00.000+08:00

Raining today morning - huddling under my umbrella, the groaning dark clouds, the staring straining wind, the harsh rain... - Saddens me to no end. No idea why. I guess when they say - when it rains, it pours... well. kinda.
i got to work quickly,.. throat dry but i cant escape work meetings. So i attended - work details are meaningless - left very soon after, back to my desk, sat down and plugged in my ear phones. Sermons.

RINGRING
"Ok." I hung up.
And went back to the computer of emails. I felt a coward hiding behind the phone, but I was not sure i wanted to say anything. I skipped breakfast (not hungry), drank lots of water (really thirsty); felt a bit sad, and a bit of a twit, and even the thought that none of the thoughts matter anyway didn't really cheer me.

Boop.

Just read PME's blog (my private best friend whose name i cant reveal). I wonder if i'm abnormal sometimes. A little too warm for sentiment, i actually feel like crying.

Some of what she wrote:
"Ever since i started working from 9.30-7, 5days wk, i don't get to see him for even a minimum of 5 hrs. Yes, the depth of missing him gets deeper, but i can't ask for more. If he can meet me for only 15mins, he will leave after 15mins. Whenever he said he wanna meet me, i'll asked 'for how long'. His definite answer will b, 'awhile i gotta go already, better than nothing right'. It sounded rather forceful, but if i do miss the chance of him coming over to look for me, i'll have to wait for the next time he can meet me for another 15mins or shorter."

"Silence is the leader now"

"for the decision to leave before i have the chance to bid him goodbye."

"We got very elated whenever we meet, but time is always so short. He will need to go whenever his phone rings. N i'll always have to see him leaving with my smile on. Thou the pinch persists."

I cant imagine the terrible feeling my girl is going through,.. him belittling her feelings, not knowing anything. Nothing. It's like yelling. without a voice.

A pause.
I'm actually a walking headache now. and nothing forms an intelligent sentence in this blog entry. sorry if i manage to bore u.
good night xxxxx

Statement of fact on the condition of being female

2008-04-14T14:54:00.000+08:00

Hair Removal Day.

Pea and i popped by to see if there were slots for the female grooming and there was.
I am never excited with this element of hair removal regime, (although not monthly but definitely regularly enough to be annoyed) for the fact that waxing is usually administered by some rough woman whose name ive forgotten today (please look for Miko at The Cathay. She's the best ive met so far) : the impatient and harsh strip, forgetting i'm human, forgetting the skin is uberly sensitive there also. Today however... was her doing of boiling, ovenlike wax. On me.
Good grief.
When i say i walk out the room feeling horribly slapped, i am not kidding.
And i pay, mind u.. for this goosepimpled hell.
(I wish i was a masochist)

Of cos i'll have to admit the few benefits that derive from all this pain: Baby soft skin, tiptop hygiene, easy cleanup.... Plus the torment ends the moment u step out of the room. No sting, no wound.

I never said this entry was a complaint - Just.. please refer to Subject Title again :)

I did brow tweezing today too ( i told u it was hair removal day) .
There are not many optimal methods of brow plucking... threading is great but i cant do it today (my brows are a mess!!) and shaving?? - the lazy way to look okay (think effects of ingrown hair and terrible stubble Yucks).

The tweezing was "shiok" although i could feel the ripping of the tiny hairs..... i even fell asleep!
I think Brows are so easy. Heehee
(maybe i am a silent masochist)

In case u are wondering, No,.. i am not easily marketed. I just keep returning, keep coming back for "suffering"... and i wonder why (Ha ha)

All the "effort" we females go into.

Some photos from Friday 11-Apr-08
I'm sorry if u're sick of Hansel.. As u can tell, i am most definitely not :p

Saturday 12-Apr-08

I wanted to go Ikea but remember i said, it was a hurry up and wait, hurry up and wait day.. ? Well it was. But i was also pacified afterwards. So i shut up.

JKN and i launched straight for a movie at midnight instead. In tees and sloppy hair. Which explains why we were "trucker-capped".... and i was trucker "JUST A GOOD OL' BOY" tattered cap - i know, but its a charming piece.
Movie was awesome - I am not surprised.

We had a lovely lovely time.

Sunday 13-Apr-08I am really happy for the boyfriend today. and Happy especial day Baby.
I said Blessed today.. and he had to add Blessed Wonderful!

Blessed Wondeful indeed.
Kisses.

i really do.

2008-04-13T08:23:00.000+08:00

The relentless stagnant air when i woke up. Oh, aircon's already switched off .. Boo.
Friday night saw pea, fan and me over at JKN's....... i wanted to play wii Rabbid with them and they wanted to see Hansel. Right forearm hurting from all that tennis (real tennis training on wednesday!) so for the first time, wii games gave me a scare. Painful.

"Hansel looks like a bear."
"He is only a month plus old?! He's gonna grow real big.."

They all say that. And i had forgotten how i told JKN the day we went to see the puppies, that i wish Hansel will grow to look like his dad. I may regret that.
Hansel's dad is BIG. BUT THANK GOD, ALSO CUTE!

Of late, Hansel has been eating. alot. Always. Hungry.

oh well.
On another note, i havent been shopping. i said i want to but i havent.
i saw this gorgeous pair of shoes (red and black), and i will buy it no matter what.
i am going to spend a wholly obscene amount of money on myself. :)
HEEHEE

am spose to attend arrow today (like now!!), but not anymore.
It's a hurry up and wait, hurry up and wait day.

i feel like there are crossed wires in my head.
heyy i just want to enjoy today.

It would be this.

2008-04-13T08:09:00.000+08:00

I could catch up with a great deal of people.

I spoke to shawnie boy yesterday while half lazing at work (report me for all i care.. no, seriously please go)
I miss him. His voice so very familiar, his laughter and that ever-so-i-dont-care demeanor... his insistent ways of not telling me Anything, and my superpower ways of finding out Everything.
He's my boy.

I'm only feeling a mite tired

2008-04-11T16:55:00.000+08:00

At this point, i need to just walk into my bedroom - in hope of a full-brain-melting-sleepy-point.

Am on computer holiday, sweeties

2008-04-11T16:41:00.000+08:00

U guessed it. My computer bailed out on me.
I'm on my laptop now, uploading this brief blog... (although from the looks of it this is alot of work - all the overdue photos)

It's 1:31am 11-Apr-08 now. I promise to sleep before 2am because i cant take advantage of the morning calls everyday 3-4 times every morning. No moan no groan tmrw (Please!! JKN will get madders at me.)
It's Friday! That should well make up for everything.

Hansel's

Pea's gown fitting - A Wedding Affair

Jumbo Seafood - The Extended Family

A Wedding Affair - Live @ Mediacorp

Chummy chummy with the girls

I miss the girls so much. I miss swimming at the pools and playing at the beaches, heavy cloud tanning (!), house parties, kissing (!!), shopping for cute shoes, expensive threads and decent bras, exchanging make up tips and reviews... Plain awesome u know.

Same for the meetup i had with pingB - hey girl, u might be asking yourself why are u doing the things that u do... what could possibly make u do all this (i am still reading your blog, of cos i am) and the answer is,... well. i guess . the prospect of being happy with him or.... (heeps!) the prospect of making him happy (not u) - I HOPE NOT.
Let's get this straight. He's not my most favourite guy when it comes to boyfriends for my girlfriends. I'm more of a no-complications girl. BUT...................... i try seeing how happy u look with him.. Yeah .Exactly. So i give in LAA.
I support u. (Always!)

Love love uuu

ONLY HANSEL; ONLY ONLY HANSEL.

2008-04-11T11:39:00.000+08:00

A Must-Catch Hansel's First Day at Me Crib.
BOY WAS I EXCITEDDD.

My Star-Crossed Lover

2008-04-03T13:19:00.000+08:00

Phone call from the boyfriend earlier. He's in Bangkok, sharing a bed with 3 other male friends in nothing but boxers(no kidding), gleefully acting cute and jumping everywhere (high possibilities) to an awesome splendid holiday. AM I ENVIOUS.
No, truely,.. i'm excited for him. AND Ok . a little envious ok. Boo.
Envious because i love Bangkok. It's my other Home! Whether by divine right or unspoken charter, the entire city feels just like home; like everyone's decided to piss off from work and no one's working but resting.. and shopping and resting.. and shopping. Hee hee.

And then there's forgoing sleep for massages, for fantabulous Thai food, for Suam Lum Night Bazaar...

I hope JKN buys me a great deal of stuff. Bah!

Speaking of him and of the recent incident - my Star-Crossed Lover (opposed by fate but approved by God),.. wrote me something in his blog and made me read it (fully convinced i'd go swooning over the romantic gesture - well, at least he's trying).

With my logical mind i'd say he's the odd one, the stubborn one.
In my heart i say he's really a gift. God's gift.

Just want to say i'm glad for everything that took place; and it can still be best summarized as (what i previously wrote) "It's funny, but I actually think everything that's happened has been positive for me." - of which I still feel very strongly for.

In sticky situations like this, u see God's evident work... u see how He delivers u, strengthens u and never never leaves u.. Ever.

(Tears are not enough, God is your enough )

Smiles.
Such is the power of His unconditional Love.

So there everyone. Work has been a Beez (not a breeze but Busy Bee: Beez).. with compulsory Handover Meetings, New Client Meetings, Conference Calls, Tight Deadlines and whatnot... (notice i caps the first letters of all work-related terms; believe me i am almost professionally wired to type like this). And i still signed up for tennis!

"Hallelujah!" I AM SHOUTING! So Happy for Tennis!
Only a female corporate worker with a non-existent exercise life can shriek at a volume loud enough to shake all the fats in the world away today. tonight. HAHA.
I live to tell the tale of my almost extinct sportslife. and i complain to not winning the boyfriend at sports (i even doubt now my swimming expertise).

He flies a plane for work, goes to the gym twice/ thrice weekly, does weights and gets muscle cramps from sitting too long in front of his laptop.

I send and reply emails for work, goes home to chicken rice twice weekly, does couch-potatoing and gets mensus cramps monthly because i do not exercise.

i really quiver.
(HAHAHAHA)

For the first time

2008-04-03T10:40:00.000+08:00

in my life, im having a puppy... of which is JKN's now.
It's a long story why Hansel the puppy's nestling at the boyfriend's homey now, but at least i get to still see him. He's a bunch of love and happiness; the baby i never taught i would have at a tender age of 24. HAHA.

Neither Hansel's poo nor pee frighten me much - when u want him no less than comfortable, being a maid isnt hardship (even for sure-hell-stinky poo).

If you meet Hansel u'll know the true reason why even dog-haters love him.

I have my boyfriend to thank for keeping Hansel's name ... despite his looks of a ..err.. Simba. and to have to call him that.

Thanks JKN!

My First Roll of Fisheye

In such days as these,

2008-03-26T13:46:00.000+08:00

i'm thankful for the Monday time off i had; an extension to easter friday...
I caught Horton! and spent quality quality time..

and of cos, superly overly thankful for Hansel..
A Gift of God.

Thank you Jesus.

Lord of All
Shout praises to the holy One
God makes us strong we'll see His will be done
From the highest place
He came to save us

We stand in the power of His name
salvation's work in our lives proclaim
living from the kingdom of hope within us.

Bridge 1:
shine Your light, be that city of light.

Chorus:
We're gonna shout out loud, its time to let it out
It's your life in me for all to see.'
Cause our God reigns always till the end of days
We're gonna stand strong, stand tall
'Cause Jesus Christ is Lord of all.

Verse 2:
God colors flowing through my life
I'm not the same now my heart desires
To see the whole world come to know You

Bridge 2:
I'll shine my light, be that city of light

chorus
Shout, shout we're gonna let it out
Shout, shout we're gonna let it out
shout, shout we're gonna shout
Jesus is Lord.

Silence is Golden.

2008-03-18T14:58:00.001+08:00

I'd like to think that that really works for me.

Scented Candles and Incense Sticks

2008-03-18T14:47:00.000+08:00

I'm almost choking . Yet strangely also,.. i'm enjoying the warmth and the lightly scented room.

It's funny, but I actually think everything that's happened has been positive for me.
It made me realise the patience i never imagined i could give, the sensitivity towards the other party, managing others' expectations, managing my reactions (to not fly off the handle at any little thing)......... and lastly.. a change in perspective.

Suffice to say it wasnt a fantastic night yesterday.
Suffice to say tho. I am a stayer. but the limit was well and passed.

Suffice to say Who has me, but Jesus.. who truely knows.

(all hate cannot be found; it refuses to be.
Whatever for? I am only thankful.
If you ask for patience, does God give you patience or put u in situations to develop patience?
The latter seems to work for me. and i cant agree more how a better person it has made me to be.)

So who knows

2008-03-13T14:54:00.000+08:00

When i came back home, all that matters is how to have a better part of a night.

so i wont mention who pissed me off at work today (i am on a high; i am having my P.!)

5 things i miss when i'm at work

- Having the Internet .

- Walking around the house in PJs

- Playing Wii Rabbid and proving my worth at Stage 6! (i lurve spider rabbid)

- A lie in..... shrugging off all worries and sleeping till noon. No one home to bug me..

- SHOPPING. MOVIES. IN-HOUSE MOVIES (read: DVDs!)

5 things i do not miss on a 12-Mar-08 Wednesday night

- Work, emails, blackberry, Dell notebook.... You get the drift

- ZOUK . HAHAHHA

- Alcohol, inebriated people, vomit pools, over-sweaty young chaps and chapesses on the dance floor, late nights... basically,....... zouk/ any clubs deem fit.

- Midweek-save-me-work-crisis. I do not have a CRISIS anymore. :)))

- Sleeping late. Figuring i cant finish what i want to tonight. It's 13-Mar-08 already.

Hi Stevenn,

2008-03-12T14:59:00.000+08:00

haha.
i know. it sounds funny to be talking to u (via blog!).

but i'm thinking of u buds! (i call steven BUDS, he calls me PADS. I'm serious)

It occurred to me the posts i post, the pictures i upload,.. that buds reads them, sees them.
He makes the effort to find out about my life, drops me an email (and doesnt reply), chats me up on msn (and we both dont reply), promises to meet at zouk (but i dont show up..) ETC .

i remember the first time i met him at zouk. My insurance exams and him, a banker.. quickly gave us a conversational springboard even though HE WAS DRUNK (to date he still refuses to admit it).
I liked him immediately. No, not the like-love. I was just surprised at how easy we both hit it off.
To be honest, we dont hang out or anything.
Lunch? Nope.
Occasional dinner? Nope.
I havent so much as even seen him in broad daylight.

We only text, email, msn --- all poor approximations of communication actually.

so WHY do i bother with such a friend?

Because when i was down in the pits of the nadir, when i was crying (counting, i've called him Crying more than i did Not Crying).. Buds talks to me. he doesnt just talk. he practically also yells and screams at me.
He does that because he wants the best for me and thinks i dont. (Weird.)
He does that and makes me cry even more.. he drives down to my place, sits me at the Maple Park and starts making me cry again. Then drives me to his place, sits me at his Olympic-sized swimming pool and starts making me cry again.
i keep crying until i understood what he meant.

i didnt sleep that morning.

thanks buds, for being who u are. i honestly couldnt buy a better chap. HEEHEE
and deep down i know u'll always be here for me :)
(really u would. u're just a stone's throw away LOL)

Honey Stars and Milk

2008-03-12T14:56:00.000+08:00

Just got back from the Boyfriend's.
Dinner was a simple fare but again, too awesome.. all for that it was homecooked and very tastilycooked. Sigh . I should be inspired to cook again.
Actually i am.

I wish i could tell u more about work, everything about work, but i cant. and when i cant, when i get cautious about what i blog (of work and what happens AT WORK), i omit alot of stuff. and nothing. will. make. sense.
(Subtlety is not my strength.)

Just know, for stress relief. . i ate HoneyStars.

On a side note, i caught the movie premiere of SLAM last night with my sissyboo Deedee.
My sister works for a media company; a Singapore Basketball magazine to be exact.
Thus the free tix and mind u, it was a World Premiere... Yes.
My first to a Movie Premiere. of the WORLD. Never mind that the cast are from Beijing China, never mind that they speak perfect chinese....
It is a great movie!! I promise.

I am thinking of signing up gym for
1) One Raffles Quay, Capital Tower, 1 George (Fitness First).. all intimately located near my workplace. WALKING DISTANCE!!

2) I'm aching. My back, my neck and now.. my legs.

3) If i go to the gym everyday, i'll hit the sack before 12 midnight. I'll be really dog-tired. Which makes good; it is the unspoken logic to sleeping early, waking early. :))

Aah.
I went 1 George with JKN a few weeks ago. BOY, he was like the PT, i was like,.. i dont know. a student going for PE?
I did this stepping side twist thing. (See, i dont even know the name to it),. anyway, it is completely awful and i hate it. Hate hate hate it.
I was aching 10 mins after. SO FAST!.
It is a devil machine and it wants me dead.
I turned to see the Boyfriend happily doing weights. His muscles. were..Gulp. ok,. I didnt know they were big.

I traded for the thread mill.. and smile...... This is so much better. I kept at it for the longest time,.. and well, kinda. maybe.. Ya. i think i kept going back to it. The only thing i'd know to do right. *Smirk.
Bench press, whatever press.. i cant do. Weights, i dont want to do.
Suffice to say i am not fit to hold the man's towel. HAHAHAHA

Glad to say tho, i couldnt finish dinner thereafter. and for the first time, i crashed EARLY.

SURPRISE, SURPRISE

2008-03-12T14:23:00.000+08:00

Blogger photos are working again.
what is their problem, really.

Enjoy, the disposable camero shots.
i love them because of the colours..... u neednt edit any.

Hi, if you're still here gagging for content. I have it here today.

2008-03-10T14:44:00.000+08:00

I thought JKN's laptop wigged out.
I cant seem to upload any photos too! Omg!
It shows:

"We're sorry, but we were unable to complete your request. The following errors were found: blogID: Required field must not be blank."

Either that or:

"Server Error The server encountered a temporary error and could not complete your request. Please try again in 30 seconds. "

It DOES NOT work even after 30 seconds, so i give up.

There are a bunch of photos i have yet to post----- those from the disposable camera.
Brill shots; much more brillant than those taken by a digital camera sometimes...

Since so with the other uploaded photos one entry ago, i shall give you the skinny on what happened over the month (where i so forgot i had a blog.) Goodness me.

The February/ March Inventory:

Apart from CNY, which really got me beaming (not just the $$$ but the holidays), i caught more movies than i had intended to, which totally gets me off. i get enamoured of romance/ action movies so much, i should consider marrying a movie star/ director.
And i can watch dvds alone. In theory JKN says we watch DVDs together... but sleep takes him away except for when he's really intrigued by the movie, so it's really just a 1-man show. or 1-female watching the show.. HAHA.
but the LCD TV is king sized and good; plus i have the company of my fave sour cream and onion chips..
I can just about deal.

Bintan was the next best thing that happened to me in the month of Feb.
We travelled on 12-Feb, with no intention to coincide with Valentines Day. JKN's leave was just and had to be planned as that. Much concerns were raised and brought upon, but who doesn’t go through that?
Is that a good or bad thing? I dont know. We've had enough considerations and actually, i dont really care anymore.
We booked the tickets on 11-Feb.. yes. How eleventh hour. But how fun is that also. It's been a dog's age since i did something spontaneous and boy do i love it!
Receiving pink roses (Although not Hot Pink. Tell my partner there are many shades of pink please) on the day of arrival to Singers 14 Feb practically had me flew to the sky.
How can i complain.

I've never missed my best friend this much this month, all years add together.
Yes, she's the one you see on channel 5 The Wedding Affair trailer; airing 13-Mar. I wont dish on the details; catch the juicy stuff yourself. :))
She is the awesome.

I have stopped using the words "fuck" and "shit".
I know. They're just words. No need to get my knickers in a twist.
But how these words have lost their power to offend...
After a little reprimand and concerning high sign from my little hero, i began to wonder the words i so often use and of context i have so little regard for. WHY?
I know they are not real insults to anyone; or for being who i am... but. I only use them to give vent. So, why. Come on, quit it already.
Few weeks ago I heard this really sweet female friend of mine go, "FUCK!" She was obviously annoyed. Gawd. It sounded Really Ugly.

I'm using "Cripes" and "Shoots" now.

Thats all for the inventory. Aah.

It's kinda late and i'm just waiting for the Boyfriend to finish updating his computer.
If anything, i hate IT Rubbish. and i have him to thank for fixing up my speakers in a mere 5 seconds... imagine no music on my desktop for 3 freaking years. Thats what.
Genius! Praise God!!

I had a fantastic day today, whichever way we'd thought come.
Went to a driving range today; figured the amount of money i'll actually spend on Golf........stared at the pink golf clubs and thought. well. um. they be worth it.
Remember to ask Mat about the golf club webbie and lessonssssss.

SO MUCH TO SAY

2008-03-10T06:19:00.000+08:00

here i am online.. at JKN's homiee, hoping to upload the photos i promise myself to,.. for the third time.
i'll pass. Post the photos back soon.

Gawd.

Bless this LAPTOP, JESUS!!

It's a new entry today i decide.

we woke up late to a sweet breakfast; a spread of rice, beans, fishcake, fish and chickie wings.. (which i cant finish but am full of appreciation for). Yum.
You may be under the impression that i'm one hard-to-please person, all shopping and movies but as of always,... i cant be bothered how everyone else thinks.. and as of last night, i'm officially all gooey over the Wii Rabbid game.
It is gawdddingly so hilarious. a cheap laugh really makes me happy.

we have some errands to run in a wee while which cancels church service today. i was a pouted sad at first but nothing a mini praise and worship im having here and the presence of King J couldnt take care of.
JKN's really busy fixing things up in another room. i dont usually like talking about my boyfriend especially so in a blog (i dont know how private this blog is anymore... am thinking of closing it and having it elsewhere), but unexpectedly, i do today. i feel filled. i am gagging for more writing.
so my boyfriend's busy today. and somehow between the nice-and-rough, he gave me a quick kiss this morning and apologised we couldnt make it for church.
It does matter (of cos it does!) that i felt the whole thing was so sweet i could do a little wii rabbid dance in the kitchen.

rest assured guys, that i'm well, well looked after. although my patience is testeddd with JKN sometimes, i am enjoying every minute of it. Jesus bless this.

I have so much more to write, but he's bathed, changed and good to go now.
abit of an anti-clamax.... but what to do?

WAIT, WHILE I FINISH THIS

2008-03-07T10:43:00.000+08:00

27TH

2008-01-28T07:06:00.000+08:00

just got back from a tanner's tan.
sunday tanning gets me tingly . it really does.
it was a cloudy tan tho.
and i oiled the entire car seat. Cripes.

ive got so much happening of late (got me messy, got me really tired but i refuse to panic.. at least i try. i know Jesus has made my days , He has called them blessed. i will reignnn and even on an evil day i will stand.)

i wish for a quiet day in.
of crossed legs and in your arms, reading a book.
oh did i mention how awesome author Belle de Jour is? she's like Hornby. and now, ive decided i like her more than Hornby.

25-Jan-08
Had a meet up with pea, fan, shas and alicia for a while, a good catchup if a little brief.
the only photo i have that shas tagged.
(i need a haircut.. the last was -gasps- "i dont even remm when")

attending fourth today.
rush, panic, bathe, no clothes to wear, better not be late again.
goofy kisses. MUAHH.

THE BOUNDLESS ENTHUSIASM OF THESE

2008-01-27T15:52:00.000+08:00

Cast of characters in my life.
All softness, nuzzle and warmth.

tagged

18 Feb 08- ZOOK
How often do we zook together? we dont. we rarely do anyway. Missed fan and han, hope we do one full squad together next time.
And although ive stopped clubbing altogether (well, almost.), i keep getting asked back . and i keep doing it for love.

Note to self: never drink too much once again. and puke and take photos. i can never negotiate to look better in photos all red, misty eyed and rubbish hair. seriously. TAKE PHOTOS BEFORE ALCOHOL. no one will understand this better than i do anyway.

i think i've learnt my lesson.
IF YOU DRINK, DONT DRIVE.
friends, IF I DRINK, DONT SHOOT ME.

Note again: talk about crossing paths.. being a blessing and being blessed. i am thankful and uber glad for the people in my life. i wish i could see more of shawnie and pingb tho.

They be dope.

WHEN IT GETS BUSYY . REALLY BUSY.

2008-01-22T12:12:00.000+08:00

13-Jan-08

Elmer the patchwork ellie

The Perfect BBQ/ Picnic Float Pool Party - This will be the float race (i'm planning!!)

I HATE TO ADMIT IT BUT IM SERIOUSLY IN A RUSHHHH....................................... BYEBYE.

BULLCRAP

2008-01-11T15:25:00.000+08:00

Biding time is something i feel should only be done in jail.

a few good hours past, is one of my greatest improvements so far. for u.
and if u put friends, work and sleeping together.. u'll realise u cant find the effort to want to make me happy,. and i cant find it in myself to do your job.

so what is a better outlet than guns?

MY WEEKEND BOX.

2008-01-08T12:46:00.000+08:00

i really love the weekend box.
because its easy on a weekday work week to be on a low ebb, to feel pensive, to feel alittle conflicted, chaotic., messed up .
and then realise, u're just making all that trash up. getting too poetic, too romantic. for attention.

why chase rainbows when u already have them?
Jesus gives me everything. and i am so Happy.. u know. i am nothing without Him. In Him i am and have everything.
This is my true happiness.

05-Jan
SOCCEROOS.
Investing in a good game.
Waiting for the manager to "Give our balls back!" That's 8 balls in total. Cheez.

06-Jan
DSLROne is not allowed to take photos in church. i did and did it with flash. which is like a double NO. IM SORRY.. but i couldnt resist this camero. It's 5D and toooo good to be true. Yes it is.

Ban Heng Restaurant

how was i to know my aunt would buy us dinner here?

It's a crack up! It really is.
JKN's dad had his birthday here too and gawd i was nearly sitting on the same seat. that would be an intentional deja vu.

HAHAHHA. oh and may i add i love my cousins i really do.

Night note:
What and how better to sum it up than Oversleeping and Soccersockers -- i love uuu.
I love matilda, massages, and cut-too-deep toe nails.
Morning was a nightmare tho,. thank God for warm toasty hugs. Blanketing me with your warmth (talk about perspiration!!)

In hindsight, the best sight perhaps. i can say, it was well worth it. =)

I MAY BE LATE..

2008-01-03T12:49:00.000+08:00

BUT DO U SERIOUSLY THINK I CARE?

HAPPY NEW YEAR! BLESSED 2008!

JESUS, THANK YOU FOR 2007. AND THANK YOU DADDY.. FOR THE SUPERLY BLESSED 2008.

"all hearts".

JUST ONE PERSON

2008-01-03T11:53:00.000+08:00

WHO WOULD HAVE THOUGHT?
u would know what would surprise me.

I WANT YOU TO WANT ME.

JUST ONE PERSON. You. make a new home to me. This is probably old news, but it isnt for me. i remember. and i remember it well.
I remember how happy i was. i was heart-on-sleeve but u were charming and the whole thing was just brillantly romantic.

go on, leave me breathless.

CHRISTMAS 2007 @ JKN'S.

2008-01-03T08:55:00.000+08:00

I MISS PARTIES ALREADY.
Here are the photossssss i have been too lazed to posttttt.

24th Dec 07

Serene's Camero

Louis' Camero (read: DSLR *slurps*)

Thanks for opening up your house Pumpkin.!

GLOWSTICK IN HAND

2008-01-03T06:33:00.000+08:00

ALL HAIL PHOTOS FROM EVERYWHERE, ANYWHERE, FORGOTTEN WHERE.

MY SHINY HOT BABES
Only the finest.

SHAWNIE who will carry my laptop for me. who will create trouble and tell me the only place in town i should be standing at is the stage in heeren. who will walk towards HMV and tell me he cant go in just to prove his point.
its a good crack with helluva sweet intentions.. and i love him.

FANIA POUPEElike the silver glare of a disco ball, thats how sparkly my baby is. We did dinner and to our most cuddly delight, found out how some things just never change.. that. God brings us here. that we'd never give each other up. i love pea pea and poupee.

WHEN I HAVENT HAD A TASTE OF THIS MISO THING.

I REALLY THOUGHT IT WOULD TASTE YUMMERS. NO!. DONT EVEN FEED YOUR PETS WITH THIS.i feel like chucking it out of the window. Makes me sick. Thumbs down... always always pride yourself with good food. Never never eat this.

FRUFRU AND TIGERLILY I was a wow when i saw fan in this label. not that she wouldnt don on a local piece but fan is a brand-whore! ok!. ya. she's almost against vintage and indie. so just how inspiring is this. she looks so hot,.. drove me to high.

IF IT WERE THAT EASY, I'D MOVE IN WITH THEM. BETTER YET, WE'LL ALL GET MARRIED, MOVE TO MARINE DRIVE AND BE NEIGHBOURS.

CHRISTMAS SHOPPE.

THEODORE!! LOOK AT HIM!!!!!!!!!

THE THREE GOLDEN KIDS that made my tanner's day. i was neck-burnt, face burnt and amused.

OLD SERANGOON. OLD HOMIE. IDEAL COFFEESHOP. HAPPY DUCK RICE.
Nostalgia is the way to fab food. no strict diet... because i am ALWAYS HUNGRY!!

CHRISSY FINALLY CUT HIS HAIR. YAYYY TO GOOD LOOKS AND ROCKABILITY.

SUNDAY SERVICE PRE-CHRISTMAS EVE. My broken french mani and fan's disco silverment.

NOISETTE CASSETTES

SQUEEZE PLEASE.
JKN never bothered to tilt his head. Like an arrogant charged brat.

MEET JANIE JANE. THE GIRL WE WERE 4 YEARS AGO.

DUNKIN DONUTS FROM INDO.

DESSERT WINE @ WINE COMPANY

To be honest, dempsey's quite boring. but dessert wine is easy. easy to love. =)

WHO SAYS I WILL NEVER BE BACK??

2008-01-03T04:52:00.000+08:00

WHAM BAM, THANK U MA'AM: an overload. from DSLR DSLR DSLR.
In good spirits. The company's leftover photos.

and if u knew,. everyone in my team is a party girl.

Your Guardian Angel

2007-12-12T15:50:00.000+08:00

When I see your smile
Tears roll down my face I can't replace
And now that I'm strong I have figured out
How this world turns cold and it breaks through my soul
And I know I'll find deep inside me I can be the one

I will never let you fall (let you fall)
I'll stand up with you forever
I'll be there for you through it all (through it all)
Even if saving you sends me to heaven

It's okay. It's okay. It's okay.
Seasons are changing
And waves are crashing
And stars are falling all for us
Days grow longer and nights grow shorter
I can show you I'll be the one

I will never let you fall (let you fall)
I'll stand up with you forever
I'll be there for you through it all (through it all)
Even if saving you sends me to heaven

Cuz you're my, you're my, my, my true love, my whole heart
Please don't throw that away
Cuz I'm here for you
Please don't walk away and
Please tell me you'll stay woah, stay woah

Use me as you will
Pull my strings just for a thrill
And I know I'll be okay
Though my skies are turning gray

I will never let you fall
I'll stand up with you forever
I'll be there for you through it all
Even if saving you sends me to heaven
[to fade]

MEL'S TUESDAY RECEIPE.

2007-12-12T11:58:00.000+08:00

im sickers baba today.. a throbbing headache and an overcooked fever overnight.
i was drugged.
Think Painful meets Couldnt get out of bed and u'll pretty much get the picture.
i was so dizzzzed out, i half texted half slept my manager 3 times before i finally sent out a message.

im quite excited tho. to announce that pea also skipped work.

because we have been well behaved for a couple of months (since july after we promised never to take medical leave on the same day unless truely certified sickers), we decided its ok to be a little bit complacent. HAHHA.

so i replied pea.
For the uninitiated, Para means Paralyzed. not Para Para Sakura or Para Para Dance. whatever Para means. i am so done for in the morning sometimes, i have no idea who truely understands what i text and what they mean. Kudos to u if u can. =))

INSOMNIA.

i do not know when to quit. i always tell my drs the medicine i want; medicine that are more/ less unnecessary than what i need, cough syrup that taste better than it should, so. maybe thats why he couldnt care less giving me Insomnia pills. haha.

i can because i am well! perfectly healed in Jesus name!!!

RESTING AT OUR BEST

even in our most seriously saturated sleepy status, we meet for lunch.
A riot of colours and bursting energy. For all that i go through, i know u will always be here with me. ilu pea.

SATURDAY MASSIVE CHRISTMAS MAYHEM

2007-12-09T15:39:00.000+08:00

much to everyone's delight, it is finally here.

friday night. the last "dance practice"

reminder: this is a company's event. somehow im hoping we dont look like lap dancers from a club HAHA.
the performance was good tho (if i say so myself). Good because i thoroughly enjoyed myself! some wrong steps maybe, pea tripping on wires, me removing the garland from the floor INCLUDED.

more photos when i get themmmmm. MUAH

MAIN DISH OF THE NIGHT. BIG LOVE.

CRM FIZZES AND EXPLODES IN YOUR FACE.

TEQUILA SHOTS. BLACK-CLAD ARISTOCRATIC CROWD.

JKN AND MELUpon getting called up to stage for the newspaper game, josiah kelvin's name came as "JO-SEAH KELVIN". heehee.
"Jo-seah" sounds very much like the mandarin for "sit down" . "ZHUO XIA!" HAHHHHAHHAHAHHAA. i am rolling on the floor now.

MEL, GERI AND PEA

MEL, EILEEN AND PEA

THE GIRLS AND THE MALE STRIPPER (oh ya. chris is behind too. like really BLACK CHRIS.) HAHAHA

i love pea. i hate my dress. of cos its ironic. tie me to the tree and i'll tell u the truth : i hate my dress. this kate moss dress from topshop. i have no idea how i had seriously wanted to buy it. But i did. so anyway. believe it or not, i won the BEST DRESSED FEMALE tonight.

and i didnt even catwalked. i just froggg legged the stage. JESUS LOVES ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Yes. we ended the party at BRIX. GAWD. the band is an awesomeness. when asked what drinks would u all like? i went "CHAMPAGNE CHAMPAGNE CHAMPAGNE." (no, not nagging. i just kept chanting.)
YAYYY! so many bottles of moet. =)))

can u two just stop getting on my nerves and make up already? see?. this makes phototaking so much easier =)

we? we dont quarrel. we just beat each other up and write hurtful poems in the rain. Emo kids.

SHIMA AND BENOIT

IQBAL AND GF

BOOBS TO PUMP UP THE HIGH VOLUME.

K I S S I N G To wrap up the night, we were either dancing nonstop or k-i-s-s-i-n-g nonstop. As what pea (inebriated or not) would say, ("WE ARE VERY LOVE."). Love indeed. Rebelliousness + MUAH MUAH = BIG BIG LOVE.

THAT DEFINES INTEREST.

MORE INTEREST. (ITS. KISS)

ALICK, THE NIGHT PARTY CREATURE WITH THE MOVES.

RECH AND RUEL.

A pretty sweet ending for the night ends off with everyone Wasted!
Believe it or not this rocks. How often do u get to see your colleagues let loose???

i end up not bathing,. in bed. and worst! i slept with "the hair".
Grose.

*Thank you for coming*

IS THIS REAL ENOUGH FOR U

2007-12-08T15:59:00.000+08:00

u're too important to everyone
the way everyone is important to u
so i hide behind a smile
my tears break the light
but u cant tell
cos u cant see me.
anymore.

i watch the sky fly over me
raindrops hit me
silent tears i cant refuse
but i cant cry it away
u're too important to everyone
the way everyone is important to u

i saw me bleed
no, i must be dreaming
can i be who i want to be
can i pretend i cant see
can i be sick and make sense when i get better
can i be wrong. just once.
lie cold on the ground.
and be who i want to be.
Me.

(all my hate cannot be found.)

FITS LIKE A DREAM

2007-12-03T15:59:00.001+08:00

It's like.
getting the 1 million hugs again.
this is called The Heart Collaboration.
created wonderfully. fitted exclusively.

CAN I WRAP THIS? i dont know how to read a boookkk without wrapping it cover up. i dont want to spoil it.
and say, let me finish this asap. Promise.

OF WELLIES WELLIES WELLIES

2007-12-03T14:13:00.000+08:00

01-Dec-07
Deedee's BIRTHDAY!! she's 20 years old!!!!! she's a star. my star.

Multicoloured Holga
of cos im elated.
plus lily caught me red-handed.

WOOT. happy chappy.

WELLIES i saw these 3 weeks ago but they ran out of sizes. NOW I FOUND THEM ONLINE.

know whats the greatest thing? they come in PINK. Heavens.

WEEDEYE. IM DRUGGED.

ah, finally, mel's day with an amazing weedeye polaroid shot to boot. Oh. actually. no.. not mel's day.
i was commanded to go zook. no, i was not neon-coloured-glowstick-Ready Set Glo tonight but we still went anyway.
"champagne is my Kryptonite." u said.
i wanted to shout to them, "Drink responsibly!! i cant carry u all home!" but i realise im no better sometimes.
it's ok.
i got hugged 1 million times at velvet so its ok.

YOU FLOOD ME.

2007-12-01T15:36:00.000+08:00

28-Nov-07
Tokyo/ Narita. NH901. 12:05am.
fp's finally home.
fp's finally home on a jetplane. me at the airport and no cheesecake (too bad. Haha)

the things u bought home were no more impt than uuuuuu and u know it =))

worthy to be marveled at.
Hope u like what i got u too.

30-Nov-07
FRIDAY - of love, comfort and warm embrace.

Fan was complaining the girl behind me: a distracting piece of obstruction. i had to cover her face.

Fan, mel, shas

when cmas comes fizzing like champagne and we bubble nonstop. MOET!!

beautiful snow. its no wonder.

i tripped. almost fell on the escalator trying to capture a shot. hell, i still did it. YAYYY. Haha

Eyelet dress. Sharona's eyelet dress (Cockroach bitten EEEEKS!) : Proved. macro shots can be very scary.

NYDC
Imagine being brave, Ya. thats what i did. Tripping my way to ease.

Foliage

THE LOVEFRIENDSHIP VODKA

Ingredients:
2 shots of tight hugs
plenty crushed ice kisses
a dash of candy smiles

p/s thank uuu fp for driving us home. u are the shiny bit.

R E A D I N E S S

2007-11-26T18:19:00.000+08:00

read·i·ness / Pronunciation Key - Show Spelled Pronunciation[red-ee-nis] Pronunciation Key - Show IPA Pronunciation

–noun
1. the condition of being ready.
2. ready movement; promptness; quickness.
3. ready action; ease; facility.
4. willingness; inclination; cheerful consent: a readiness to help others.
5. a developmental stage at which a child has the capacity to receive instruction at a given level of difficulty or to engage in a particular activity.

[Origin: 1350–1400; ME redyness(e). See ready, -ness]
Dictionary.com Unabridged (v 1.1)Based on the Random House Unabridged Dictionary, © Random House, Inc. 2006.

in a nutshell,

i slept at 7am sunday morning, woke up at 10, went for 2nd service, (despite shawnie boy's tease that i am "PROBABLY STILL IN BED" and that he'll go for 3rd but ends up at 2nd and not meeting me. ppfft. :p. Whats the point of being so nice to u shawn. BOO. HAHHA) came back, slept at 6pm, woke up at 1030pm. and am now happily online at 214am.

that explains why.

amidst all that expectations, weariness, crying boohoo-ness, readiness,. It was all Loveliness.

P/S ming came for service. THUMBS UP. haha.

NO ONE ELSE ALLOWED.

2007-11-25T15:33:00.000+08:00

The street is ours and ours only to roam.
Complete with Loud Laughter and Impressive Shopping (NOT ME!), this is our undying love.

scream with us.

my sweetest sweetheart. the blood of me. i dont care who's who, who's what, how's what, how's where. i dont care. loads of love i have for her. one of the Best Things God made happen to my life. He gave me DeeDee .. and get this. she is really mine. HAHAHA.

you know, everyone was taking photos.

of cos we too.

SUPERMAN, LOOK AT THE STARS. LOOK HOW THEY SHINE FOR UUU.

2007-11-24T15:20:00.000+08:00

im so tired.
forgot how tiring synchronised dancing is.
i get a bursting headache each time i stretch my body muscle. Gawd.

pingbbbbb met me for din din.
of cos im happy. but we both super beat up.. really ran out of steam.
just lugging our laptops around and eating for the sake of eating.

say, why Fish & Co. again?

im so dog-tired, i was done for just putting food in my mouth.

PINGB

GARLIC. *clapclap* DIG IT.

PINK DOLPHIN.

SUPERMAN

because u're a supergirl. because even though i love spiderman more than superman.., i love uuu. FCB.

Listen:
U're an angel Heaven sent to me
Love's gonna be here for u
U'll always be my baby

COLD AND CRYING; I MUST BE DREAMING.

2007-11-23T15:59:00.000+08:00

Convince me that i've been sick forever

That tears can become ice and stab me now

And i bleed.

I HAVE LONG HAIR AGAIN.

2007-11-23T15:48:00.000+08:00

am i too afraid to face my emotions?
is that why i choose to hide?

if its nothing. then why i am running away?

if the rest can face their feelings, why cant i?
if a song speaks how u feel, why not dare listen to it again?

PISS OFF. IM ONLY POLITE TO U. IM NOT NICE AND DONT EVER WANT TO BE. TO UUU.

2007-11-22T15:06:00.000+08:00

if uuu were here with me, i promise i'll sleep in and skip work tmrw.

Ooh. so can do. i never get sick of this video.
How do i learn to dance this. except in heels.? TEACH ME.

i checked. MELISSA is not Hebrew, but GREEK for HONEY-BEE.

Time for a bedroom overhaul.

Quote: "Will you still love me if i do not bathe?"

Pea is out today and tomorrow. im so used to having her around i think i took her presence for granted. now i dont feel like going to work tmrw because i cant see her. she's mine........ i dont care if she's getting married. SHE IS MINE. haha

JESUS!! IM HALF BLOATED. EATING PINEAPPLE TMRW.

Be my horse forever. horse is a piggyride. so be my pig. SNORT. HHAAAHAHAHAHA

BEGUILING THE LONG NIGHT WITH A GOOD BOOK AND A GOOD ENTRY

2007-11-21T15:56:00.000+08:00

PICS OF THE CREW AT WORK. AT RANDOM I FOUND THEM.
HOPE IT SMOOTHENS OUT THE KINKS OF YOUR WORK WEEK THIS WEEK.

THE REASON
for this title begins with me feeling all vexed up, like a lovedrug all tripped and dizzed.. It's not about expectations and how i/ you manage them. It's not.
Maybe my P is coming.
which is YAYYYYY but i guess P makes me whine, makes me needy of TLC, makes me a child, makes me wish i needn't a good book or blog entry to spend the "long" night away. (which explains the title now and the photos. which i cant be bothered to change or remove because they're not important anymore.)

after reading (_________), i was just lifted. really lifted.
thank you Jesus.

i had the intent to go off, to sound angry, to make pissed. to make meself feel better tonight with an angsty entry.
but it was never meant to happen. :p

i feel so blessed. like, you know. nothing is that great a deal anymore. anything everything can wait.
my P can wait all it wants. you can love me all you want, hate me all you want. i dont care.
i can be happy all i like because of Him. i'm really :)

i got swept off my feet.

Note:
hey sugar, i love u.

NO RULES. LOVE LIFE.

2007-11-21T14:43:00.000+08:00

17-Nov-07
(because i decided i do bother)

A is for Andy

ICE CREAM PINGB. MY FAVE FLAVOUR.

Cradle baby

Edwin.

More sleepy than i realised.

As good as it gets.

THE PIER.

Dont they look like scarecrows along the road?

when i was 6, i used to pluck them and eat them honey off. i was young and hungry.

easy peasy.

NOT.

My PINGB ICE CREAM IS A TALENT. A GIFTED CHILD.

the day of the Art.

Infringing copyrights. if u see me, u cant totally see the art work. if u see the artwork, u cant really see me.

proves. its magic. you cant have both.

as long as u take a picture of an artwork, U ARE INFRINGING A COPYRIGHT. if you take a picture with it, you are ALSO INFRINGING A COPYRIGHT.

oh well.

Ignorance is also BLISS.

Angel Share. Cradle chairs again. we can be babies if we like.

Caged.

this is a LOMO SHOT. DONT THINK JUST SHOOT = WONDERFUL BEAUTIFUL COLOURS.

she's a hot. whee, i wetted my pants.

im just a tranquil. free from greed, lust and men. HAHHHAHAHAHA

if i had a past life, i could well have been a photographer's best apprentice.

Suntanning beds.

Belle De Jour i found her books! not sure if this is potent enough to live up to her name but i promise i'll finish it this week. i ordered Book 1 too! YES. of late, i havent been reading because im lazy and fp is messing me up. No, im not kidding. HAHAHHHA. no, seriously.. i have this weird habit of only reading books that are wrapped-covered. once again, lazy is UGH.

PINGB - (Pingb, thank uuu for spending so much time with me. that we not just be a habitue of outdoor photography places, but of every single small little activity possible. Of the best things that has ever happened to me in the past 6 years, u are one of it. u know it.

break lose babyyy, from all that dirty lotus mess. As cliche as it sounds, i have to say. i dont care. i must say. U DESERVE SO MUCH BETTER. add that No One Can Resist You. Ever. Not even me :D

love u till the end of the world.)

Where everything starts, where it will all start again. You are coming back home to me.

paints me a bright PINK.

2007-11-20T14:54:00.000+08:00

u know.

when someone cares whether its the direct salt intake u're taking. or the salt from potato chips.
ask what kinda "plastic bag" u are hanging behind your bedroom door. (Through Web Cam. To which the tank top would shout, "I'm Not A Plastic Bag!")
believes that a stuffed toy is angry. and then apologises to u. and the toy.
makes a date with u and tell u its not a date; its a time.
is asleep when u're awake; is awake when u're asleep.
is concerned if u've collected your watch and ring because the shop assistants cant take proper care of them. (What!. yea, i have no idea too.)
fave word: LOL. LOL-ed 56 times (each conversation) in msn.
tells u miss u. and then LOL + OMG. like some kinda joke.
spends 30 seconds at the gym, 30 seconds bathing, 30 seconds sending laundry, 30 seconds collecting laundry and more than 30 seconds talking to u. which is quite :)
floats like a balloon.
likes your best friend. HEEPS! quite cool actually.
whose voice is sweeter than a girl.
finding 101 reasons to get an iphone.
insists u'll want a coach bag/ wallet/ something.
thinks pupu's purple hair is blue. Gawd. really bad.
make pupu go on fire a few times.
still cant find pupu the stuffed toy.
thinks cute is adorable. funny = clown. and then calls u funny. but not a clown. (i know. i dont know also.)
downloads pussycat dolls "Fever" song for u and exclaims how it only took 10 seconds. like real fast, great connection. It's no wonder. The song. only lasted u 49 seconds.
hates the floor half wet.
smacks u to call/ tell u something.
insists didnt smack. insists not pain. insists u bear grudges.

get it?
guess.
a stuffed toy.

p/s i cant be bothered to post the photos of sat tonight cos immmm tired and i dont have anyone i want to answer to. FP, this is dedicated to uuu so dont make so much noise. u're not making much progress, only stuck at entry 1. BOOOOOO.

23RD.

2007-11-18T19:00:00.000+08:00

16-11-07 (Fan's actual birth: 17-11-07)
well deserved SHINE: happy 23rd birthday fan!

despite not meeting and catching up as often as we do Laughing at 9pm sharp, Boycotting Nat the Brat, watching Laguna Beach while on the phone with each other. i still love u.. and only more. much much more.

happy happy sweetheart.
Darling, you look wonderful tonight.

RAISE ANY MOOD AND DESTROY ANY TANTRUM

2007-11-18T18:32:00.000+08:00

these bright young kids.

photos from last friday 09-11-07.
hope it teases your day today. and make u smile again.

IN CONJUNCTION WITH ALL THAT GIFTS BUYING

2007-11-16T15:46:00.000+08:00

we also had to suzz costumes for the upcoming office christmas party on Dec 8th! Heeps! Exciting!
i know.. what an early celebration. but many peeps will be going back to their home country ----thus. the only decent thing to do: celebrato early.

which is good.
gives me a reason to happy early. :DDDDD

but will u. just imagine how tired i am.
i went to work without eye makeup today. i went to the office toilet, stared at the mirror and almost couldnt pee.
so fp was right.
i have dark eye rings.

Whee.
But im not affected. just more reason for you to give love.

BALI LANE.

IF ONLY. halloween. i. would. have. gone. as. a. red. indian.

TUTU.
its serious. i love tutus alot. it encapsulates my personal sense of style and mirrors me in all the correct fashionable sense. (right). of cos its in my fave colour what do u think. HAHHHAHAHAHA

BUNNY. SWEET.

MONSTROUS.

ok,. you look better with it.

dont expect to find me in this bad dye job and badly fizzed out hair.

A CRACK UP
please do not ever crack me up like that again. HHHAHAHAHAHA. the shoes. superly huge.

somehow. its just NOT AS FUNNY. oh well.

PART REALITY AND PART FANTASY
i love wellies. but just dont do yellow. ok.?

FRUITHATS

BLU JAZ
i was so hungers, i was this close to licking the plate. eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee. (sick). p really pushes the boundaries of hungerness. Cant help it. i need to be fed before i finally start. period.ing. :))))))

on a normal day i cant even imagine finishing a plate of pasta. today,. i could probably challenge anyone to a pasta eating war.

MIUMIU REPLICA.
yeap. uuu find replicas all over bugis. esp that Anya Hindmarch "I'm not a plastic bag" bag. Everytime i turn everywhere i turn, i see it. Gawd. its just a bag. a sweet little grocery bag. now its everywhere. people even use it as an office bag.

pui.

I AM A PLASTIC BAG just be a plastic bag LAAA. its ok. No condemnation.

OVERJOYED.

rocking socks in the cabbie. great. until pea saw a mini cockroach creeping along the window! ya. shit. i know. but im more afraid of a lizard than a cockroach. and if u ever ever get stuck in a cabbie with pea and a cockroach (regardless of size) u will never want to be screaming together with her. It just worsens the situation.

so whats a mel gotta do? be brave.

i took a tissue.. and told pea "maybe i can catch it and squeeze it to death." except. i . darent. i told her again "lets just watch its movement, see where it goes and then i'll decide to kill it anot."

she laughed, said im a coward and continued screaming again. Oh ya. the cabbie uncle? he asked me where to turn to my house. he's either afraid of cockroaches/ us getting him to kill it or just plain ignorant.

cut the long story short, we're both cowards. thank God we reached my place thereafter. pea alighted and took another cockroach-free cab home. BLEAHHHHHHHHHH

back home,

ming destruct says:
gonna slp late again agin !?!?!?

Mel: Your mighty hand is doing wonders for me. says:
hhaha

Mel: Your mighty hand is doing wonders for me. says:
ya.

Mel: Your mighty hand is doing wonders for me. says:
sigh

ming destruct says:
later ur dark ring enlarges!!!

ming destruct says:
haha

ming destruct says:
kidding

ming destruct says:
dont even know if u have any

ming destruct says:
hahaha

Mel: Your mighty hand is doing wonders for me. says:
haaha i have..

Mel: Your mighty hand is doing wonders for me. says:
seriously.

Mel: Your mighty hand is doing wonders for me. says:
just recently developed ones.

ming destruct says:
then !!!

ming destruct says:
why dont want slp leh ?

p/s you're a kind soul. appreciate it.

pp/s why dont want to sleep? dont want to face global charges. lfp is expensive.

ppp/s dark eye rings again. i can never get away with this topic can i. Boo.

DEFINITIVE

2007-11-15T15:59:00.000+08:00

have you ever stepped back and saw the goodness of someone?

SPEAK OF YOUR GREAT LOVE FOR ME

2007-11-15T15:49:00.001+08:00

i didnt run to work today. i was too happy immersing myself in His word i slept through my alarm, refused to take a cab and strolled to work with my pink umbrella.
there you have it. it was raining but. so what?

i have the coolest umbrella. (ok, somehow. the smallest too :p)

so loved today. right up. God is so good to me. here is the cheque i've been waiting for. Just in time.

that's not all. she smiled at me on monday, said hi to me on tuesday and spoke to me today. can uuu imagine how i felt? it was like she suddenly grew rainbows on her head or something. but i know... its the favour of God. she just cant help. liking me. pppppppppppfttttttt.

so so :D i cant stop smiling.

next big up: my client for no apparent reason, decides to close another deal with me. in total, he has closed 4 deals with me and get this: he hasnt even seen me till today. we closed 3 deals through the phone and 1 f2f today. he's in HK and im in singers! WHEEEE! its like BWAH! Hallelujah! i have clients i meet for the entire month who decides right after the 4th meeting that maybe,.. they should just ditch me. u know?? ya, its absolutely wondrous. uber digging it.

another biggggg up: my sister decided to fetch me after work. my little piglet felt too lazy to take a bus home today, rang me up and asked if i could pick her today. well. i wasnt going to my client's place so i canttttttt. and so she did. Cabs are almost my fave form of transport. i know. Pollution and all.. but. i. cant. help. it.

awesome.
awesome X 1000.

if the p's not gonna come, im gonna eat and sleep alot.
after din din at 8pm, i was literally floating round the house. i crashed without bathing.

weekday text msgs i wonder if u went babyyy? sorry but im kinda grossed out from weds' crowd. but u'll be going on the photography expedition with me this saturday! I CANT WAIT!!

bb u = blackberry uuu. my fave pea.

the insurance agent i love the most.

my HR manager =)

my friend?? haha. ok, shas' friend.

in Dallas! Teddy bear saves the day. and lotsa TLC.

oops.

my ex-boss from new crea who cares alot for me.

Mum with the not-so-fantastic spelling but the best mum i could ever have or ask for.

Saved.
saved polvorons. all the love in a glass.

nightingalethis picture is just apt. cos i was sposed to be sleeping. but i kinda sleepwalked to my comp and logged on. glad i did. its called the fp connection.

my nick?

"Your mighty hand is doing wonders for me".

its Jesus' hand laaaaa. what ambiguous, what i noe i noe whose hand is it. haha =))))))))))))

p/s ming, dont need to apologise. to each his own.. and let live. you be yourself, i'll be mine. X)

ESPECIALLY FOR FP. (bittersweet)

2007-11-14T14:14:00.000+08:00

i promised to blog my ass off. even if it means i have nothing to blog about, i am so going to.

its the weekday tuesday. i hate tuesdays the most cos they're neither here nor there...
plus P of the month is just round the corner i can sniff it. it just hasnt come yetttttttt. why!

pea came over.
love a plenty.over at my house, i call the shots. so u have to wear my shorts. whether they look good or not. whether they fit or not.
tight. yummy.

instant noons. u've never eaten the best noons till u taste this. and when u're really. broke.. they taste much much better. X)

shawnie boy called. shawnie gave me the creepers. said the drs found something in his mouth. after all that confession for healing (in Jesus name AMEN!), my first question was "so how many days MC shawn??!!". we were giggling. love shawnie so much.

by the way, the medication he's sposed to take should induce some severe diarrhoea. Diarrhoea-ay-tion. We three had our first thought: "shawnie's so gonna lose weight."

what's the world coming to. i love fat people. no diet whatsoever. lets fat together. MUAH.

crappers.

beautiful pea. the one i'll never stop lovinggg. and who i know will never stop loving me.

Apple Colgate my colleague jessica is a bunch of kindness. she bought so much goodies to work today i almost bursted my jeans munching on them. Gawd. everything is freaaaaaaaaking fab.

and they have apple colgate! i had her help me buy it but she gave it to me for free! YAYYY. over the moon.

Dewberry

Mini Keyk. Love. Philippines.

Goldilocks!! Polvoron.
they just conquer your tastebuds. you know?

for shawnie. Since,we havent had the 1 hour hug, here's a verbal/ pictorial form of thanks and love for the sunnies u got for my birthday (although its LITERALLY a pain to wear them) and for all that nursing of my heart.

Just doing a stock check after fp commented the many sunnies i have. actually, no. i just took pictures with them to have MOREEEE things to blog about. pppffftt. :ppp

its not everything i have.. but i think its good enough. cos im still abit ill. and sleepy. tell me i am the sweetest to u.

how could i leave this out?

looking like this is just part of my job.

for thought: some friends are just not worth keeping. why? because its not about overlooking their weaknesses. i'm asking uuu why allow them to hurt u? why be a victim to their weaknesses? i say save yourself and go on a photography expedition like me. =)))))

fp.

YOU THINK YOU DO, BUT YOU DONT

2007-11-10T16:12:00.000+08:00

i cant see myself.

MOS KING
i was so bent on collecting all the MOS characters that when i really did receive them, i was a bundle of joy.

thanksss.

BE BE YOUR LOVE

2007-11-04T11:37:00.000+08:00

If I could take you away
Pretend I was queen
What would you say
Would you think I'm unreal
'Cause everybody's got their way I should feel

Everybody's talking how I, can't, can't be your love
But I want, want, want to be your love
Want to be your love, for real
Everybody's talking how I, can't, can't be your love
But I want, want, want to be your love
Want to be your love for real
Want to be your everything

Everything...
Everything's falling, and I am included in that
Oh, how I try to be just okay
Yeah, but all I ever really wanted
Was a little piece of you

And everybody's talking how I, can't, can't be your love
But I want, want, want to be your love
Want to be your love, for real
Everybody's talking how I, can't, can't be your love
But I want, want, want to be your love
Want to be your love for real
Everything will be alright
If you just stay the night

Please, sir, don't you walk away, don't you walk away, don't you walk away
Please, sir, don't you walk away, don't you walk away, don't you walk away

And everybody's talking how I, can't, can't be your love
But I want, want, want to be your love
Want to be your love, for real
Everybody's talking how I, can't, can't be your love
But I want, want, want to be your love
Want to be your love for real

And everybody's talking how I, can't, can't be your love
But I want, want, want to be your love
Want to be your love, for real
Everybody's talking how I, can't, can't be your love
But I want, want, want to be your loveWant to be your love for real
I want to be your love, love, love

AND EVENTUALLY

2007-11-02T11:24:00.000+08:00

i did what i could do.
Instead of feeling liberated and lifted..

i feel Trapped.

thank God for drs drowsy medication.

LITTLE JOY

2007-10-31T10:00:00.000+08:00

or perhaps,. my only joy now.

MY CROWN ON THE INSIDE

2007-10-30T12:37:00.000+08:00

if uuu could,

can u please buy me these.
i managed to buy the last three Tohatos... but cant find it anymore anywhere! Boo. they can be bought with $2 from a turning machine.
i will love uuu if u find them :))))

a cartographer of the heart
when it becomes a messy black.

why is this arrangement enveloping me like an exquisite bubble? Makes me happy and makes me not.

taking center stage. when it gets bigger than my heart.

MEEELLLL'S BIRTHDAYYY

2007-10-29T10:51:00.000+08:00

i have consolidated allllllll my love:
yeay i uber love birthdays especially when its mine. Blee... WINK WINK

and this year, my colleagues were sooo sweet. i've got a pretty skirt from my team! and pea's considered my best colleague of cos....
look at this:

i was trying to copy the drawing of Alick's cow.. except i drew mine much much fatter i dont know why. Pea said my cow hasnt got much hands and legs... just a stupid double chin. Which is. like the saddest thing to say 1 day before my birthday because i think my cow looks so much better than Alick's and Pea's ADD TOGETHER.

u also think so right?. See. So.. anyhow, they went to photocopy the cow i drew, the cow Alick drew and the aristocat/ marie the cat (i dont know what pea intended to draw) and made it into a "BIRTHDAY CARD"! or paper. WHICHEVER. i love it so much. GONNA FRAME IT UP.

Birthday with my famfamfab
my mummmmy said she looks better with her hair down. i reckon she looks equally hot with both :))))

Sweet cant quite imagine my smallie sissybbooo driving me to town for dinner. so so happyyy. so clever clever clever girl.

My uncle took out a $1000 note; which isnt that big a deal.. but whoever carries so much cash in a wallet? i dont for sure :PPP

CROWD IS JUMPING - its my bday and i dont care what u think

Hope u had as much fun as i did. thanks for everything everyone. LOVE LOVE UUUUU ALL.

if i wasnt really giving any of u enough attention, its cos i was almost 100% pissed drunk. and im sorryyyy but i will make it up to u i promise. love love love love love love u.

teach me what to do

2007-10-25T12:01:00.000+08:00

so they finally got ENGAGED

2007-10-25T10:22:00.000+08:00

YEAPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP
and we were part of this whole I WANT TO MARRY U THING!! U KNOW?
cool.

Outttt.t.t..ttt.t.t.t

2007-10-10T01:31:00.000+08:00

In the light of the sun, is there anyone? Oh it has begun...
Oh dear you look so lost, eyes are red and tears are shed,
This world you must've crossed... you said...

You don't know me, you don't even care, oh yeah,
She said
You don't know me, and you don't wear my chains... oh yeah,

Essential yet appealed, carry all your thoughts across
An open field,
When flowers gaze at you... they're not the only ones who cry
When they see you

You said...You don't know me, you don't even care, oh yeah,
She said
You don't know me, and you don't wear my chains... oh yeah,

She said I think I'll go to Boston...
I think I'll start a new life,
I think I'll start it over, where no one knows my name,
I'll get out of California,
I'm tired of the weather,
I think I'll get a lover and fly em out to Spain...
I think I'll go to Boston,
I think that I'm just tired
I think I need a new town, to leave this all behind...
I think I need a sunrise,
I'm tired of the sunset,
I hear it's nice in the Summer, some snow would be nice... oh yeah,

You don't know me, you don't even care...
Boston... where no one knows my name... yeah
Where no one knows my name...Where no one knows my name...
Yeah Boston...Where no one knows my name.

BEACHERS!!

2007-10-07T11:43:00.000+08:00

When we woke up at 2pm, left the house at 3pm, ate our lunchies at 3:30pm.
we kinda knew Beach would start at 4:30pm..

by then it was no longer sunny; just cloudy, damp and........ well. goofy. cos we left the beach at 6pm. HEEHEE

We made ourselves happy tho

DIN DIN with darlene, jon, lionel lin, avril

p/s SOME FRIENDS.. are for life. no shit.

BABY MUMMY AND DEEDEE

2007-10-05T11:38:00.000+08:00

it's not how much time you spend with them.
it's how much quality time you spend with them ...

I PAINTED MY MUM'S NAILS
i thank God for my family.. i seriously do.. the bestestestestestestestest family anyone could ask for.

good news: Deedee passed her TP! im so happy!!!!!!!! Praise GOD PRAISE GOD!! omg, i was soooooooo happy and i always say, "so clever Dee!" Jesus gave me the cleverest sister =) LOVE HER LOVE HER LOVE HER

i have the smartest, prettiest, most adoring sissybooboo in the wwwWHOLE WIDE WORLD.

from sunday:

Tsu my fave-o

THAI

OR VIET

Inspired - Wayfarer

regardless of colour

i'm a girl with many wishes

2007-10-03T10:22:00.000+08:00

Mun said WHOA U POST A BIRTHDAY WISH LIST HUH.

So bitter he sounds. I decided i do one for him.
Except its really quite boring (if u ask me). there's only one darn dam thing he wants anyway.

Heehee

GORO'S
game for all shapes and sizes plus necklaces plus different colours. best if u can get him the full set.. he might just dump me for u! =D If u're a man, no problem! Anything for GORO's DUDE!

Covet Super COVETTTTT aiyo. left out my Miu Miu shoes "MIU MIU"

Visvim Christo

Remember how badly i wanted these.. in XS or XXS..

now.. omg. just the stunning red one will do.

WAUSH!

u must say WAUSH!!! like WUASH!!! (with the exclamation mark).. like !!!!!!!!!! Geddit?? Sean saw his other photo and went "very waush meh?"..... wait till he sees this.

seriously, waush what.